Faithfulness in a nutshell
You would think that a healthy and mutually satisfying relationship would leave little reason for either party to seek satisfaction elsewhere, right? Yet when it comes to infidelity, reason is not what's actually at play.
It's true, you can be attracted to someone else, even when your marriage or relationship is a good one. In fact, most people don't set out to have an affair. Even so, affairs happen all the time but is there any rhyme or reason as to why they happen? Is it possible to cheat proof your relationship? While there's no guarantee, you can take steps to protect your relationship from infidelity. Here's how...
Open your eyes
Looking into the past right from the beginning of your relationship will give you the best start. First, consider whether the person you are dating has a history of monogamy - or not. While everyone may deserve a second chance, dating someone with a history of cheating might mean you are setting yourself up for hurt and disappointment from the get-go.
If you find it difficult to broach the topic, simply ask about your potential lover's last relationship. If they don't feel comfortable talking about it, this might be an indication that they have something to hide. Conversely, you may discover that while they were true, a past partner wasn't. While we wouldn't wish this on anyone, your partner's experience of being cheated on might just work in your favor. Since your partner knows how hurtful it can be, they'll be less likely to inflict a similar hurt on you. Finding someone with a solid monogamous history doesn't guarantee fidelity, but it certainly increases the chances!
Work it
Keep innocent friendships or work relationships in check. Simply, don't let them cross any boundaries. Congratulatory hugs and pecks on the cheek, "professional bonding" activities like lunch dates and after work cocktails - these are all situations that can lead to attachments that are more than just professional or familiar. Emotional unfaithfulness occurs when a person develops a strong emotional bond with someone outside their primary relationship. This new relationship may be platonic, but it is just as dangerous as adultery. A person is being emotionally unfaithful when they seek comfort in another, while keeping secrets from the person in their main relationship.
Just friends
While everyone needs to open up to make new friends and develop good relationships, there are ways to do it that don't involve the kind of emotional sharing that one is supposed to have with one's partner. Ways to avoid emotional unfaithfulness include keeping professional relationships professional. For instance, if you go out to lunch with a colleague, invite a third party. Avoid physical contact with the other person and don't share the intimate details of your life.
If you sincerely feel attracted to the other person and enjoy conversing with them more than with your spouse or partner, admit it and then steer clear of the temptation by steering clear of the person. It's how we behave in tempting situations that opens or shuts the door on cheating. A couple's responsibility to one another is knowing where and when to set boundaries with other people.
Stay tuned
The best way to avoid an affair is to stay close, open and intimate with your partner. In a world of temptation, it's important to keep the boundaries clear. It's just as important to keep the lines of communication, love, intimacy and adventure open with your partner. Instead of keeping secrets, talk with each other about your experiences. It's only through openness that your relationship will flourish and you will remain bullet-proof against indiscretion.
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