Friday, July 10, 2009

Sex It Up – Without Sex!

The ultimate plan for better sex by S.K. Smith
Source: California Psychics

If you're looking to turn up the heat in any meaningful relationship, it's time to renew your thinking. All it requires is that you remember an old saying - and its modern twist. Absence makes the heart grow fonder - and it can make your other bits feel warm and fuzzy as well!

The premise is simple. We often want what we can't have, or at least we think we do. Usually, what we really need is a simple reminder of just how good we've actually got it! So, by nixing the nookie for a little while in favor of some extended foreplay, you'll find yourselves thinking of each other day and night, longing to see, smell, taste and touch each other - and you'll expand your romantic repertoire to spice up your sex life for the long haul.

Here's your guide to sexing it up - without sex.

Pressure drop
One of the quickest ways for sex to become boring and staid is for one or both of the partners to feel like they're doing it out of obligation. The excitement is gone, but the expectation (we're supposed to have sex, right?) remains. As a result, positions become habitual, and orgasms are perfunctory... No wonder lovemaking feels like a drag!

To rid yourselves of this "rollover" routine, remove the expectations altogether. In fact, go in the opposite direction, toward a spot of abstinence. Agree to not have sex for a night. Or two - or ten. Your kisses and touches, which may have devolved into customary warmups for the scheduled surrender, will become genuine expressions of affection and adulation. By ruling out anything other than a modest makeout session, you'll find new ways to express love and desire - as well as amping up for future endeavors.

Fantasy fodder
Having decided not to do the deed, you may be concerned that you won't even think about it. Odds are, it will be exactly the opposite. By removing your regular release from the repertoire, you'll likely have sex on the brain even more, which will lead to indulging in flights of fantasy. Make it a point to share these thoughts with your partner (being sure to include them, of course), and ask that they do the same. Let each other know that you're thinking about doing x, y or z and you may be surprised by the surge in intimacy you experience, and how it increases the sexual tension between you.

Manual transmission
Once you've agreed to go without, and you've indulged in the exchange of your sexual thoughts and fantasies, introduce a little more intensity into the equation with a sexy two-way massage. Light some
candles, play a sultry song playlist and go to town on each other, using only your hands - and maybe, if the mood srikes, your mouths. The point is to enjoy each other, and above all else, not to rush.

Remember what you learn

The most important point of all this restraint is that you take the information you've learned about each other - and the renewed passion and closeness you likely feel - back into your sex life once you reintroduce the deed. Preventing monotony in love takes work, and it may require revisiting the fornication-free zone on occasion, in order to dig yet more deeply into your relationship's sexual potential.

Are you stuck in a sexual rut? Get advice from a psychic. Call 1.800.573.4830 or click here now.

A Secret Life

Will it come back to haunt you?
Source: California Psychics

We were surprised to find out that many callers to CaliforniaPsychics.com lead secret lives, and others are the "secret" in someone else's life. Our psychics tell us the majority of their clients who have added a clandestine path to their life's journey are involved in affairs outside their relationships. Many call in to find out how their double lives are affecting their karma, and others want to free themselves of guilt.

Though our psychics feel that it is not their job to judge as they work with each case individually, they also believe that carrying secrets around will influence one's spiritual journey. Secrets in general are not healthy. They can lead to a higher good, some psychics argue, but they usually have a spiraling downward effect, and they can be painful to all involved.

"I believe that we operate in a world where the energy you put out there is the energy you get back. If you are hiding something now, something will be hidden from you," counsels Joyce ext. 9598. "This pattern is inevitable, and has been repeatedly taught throughout history, from "do unto others..." to the more-scientific and physical version of the same idea, "every action has an equal and opposite reaction."

"I myself have had a secret life in my past, and I have learned from this lesson that it does produce karma. Secrets produce trust issues in the future for all parties, and all parties can, and usually do, get hurt," BlackHawk ext. 9353 asserts. "You may find out that you should not be in one or both relationships, if an affair is your secret, but if you are going to cheat on someone, you should not be in that relationship in the first place - unless you agree to an open relationship first."

The problem with a secret life is that the words imply dishonesty, "which, regarding one's karma, is rarely a good thing," reports Jonathan ext. 9601. "As with most everything in life, the more one is dishonest, the easier it is to have dishonesty spill into other areas of life. That being said, I don't allow these generalities to affect my readings. There have been times when the secret life was actually the right path for the client, and the mistake was an earlier decision."

"Intent" is as important as the action, some psychics say, especially when it comes to understanding the "positives" of secret lives. Having a secret life can affect a caller's journey in life in various ways, believes Althea ext. 9582, whose specialty is helping customers focus on their paths. "If one's secret is the existence of self-improvement and developing a new skill, or education level… this can be positive, as well as a secret life that may involve elements of being unfaithful, as long as it is aiding the caller to gain a level of self-confidence that will aid them in leaving a bad or abusive relationship. If one sets out to hurt another by keeping a secret, this will likely breed karmic retribution."

Even if you have the best of intentions, when the secret life you have chosen causes pain to others you are often causing harm to yourself as well. Ironically, what drives folks to live in secret is fear, and when we fear something we attract more of the same, psychics say.

"Dishonesty often brings with it guilt, depression, paranoia… and these can torture the person living that secret life," explains Debra ext. 9596, who specializes in relationships.

Darcy ext. 9488 adds that because "the secret" in a secret life goes unspoken, the ultimate reason for that life being hidden is unwillingness to face a reality and to see that life for what it is. The lie to one's self, as she sees over and over again, can result in an unconscious need to be stopped - or even punished.

In order to be fulfilled and happy in life, one must first stand in their truth, our psychics remind us. "If we could be honest with each other about these things without fear or recrimination, we could erase this karmic situation completely," Joyce concludes." There are no easy answers in these complicated situations, except the truth. In the light of the truth, we are absolved."

Are you living a secret life? Talk to a psychic for guidance. Call 1.800.573.4830 or click here now.